" We come spinning out of nothingness,  scattering stars. The stars form a

circle, and in the center we dance." ~ Rumi

Lean for your self what is all about.

Install yourself comfortably , It will take you an hour to read it

Learning the Basics

Does the G-Spot Exist?

You may be wondering if the G-Spot is real.... Does it exist,

or is all the “G-Spot hype” just a selling tool for magazine articles

or adult novelties? And if the G-Spot does exist, why is it there?

Why is it so easily overlooked? What physical purpose does it

have? Does the penis touch it during intercourse?

And most importantly, if the G-Spot does exist, how does one

find it and coax it from hiding?

This book will answer all of these questions.

You may also wonder about female ejaculations — “squirting”

as the phenomena is often called. Is “squirting” merely more

sales hype, or are female ejaculations real? And if female ejaculation

does occur, why haven’t you seen it? Why does it occur?

What physical purpose is there for female ejaculations?

If you’re wondering about any of these questions, let me take

a moment to congratulate you for taking the time to enrich your

knowledge and understanding of female sexuality. As you will

learn from these pages, the phenomena of the G-Spot and female

ejaculations are not new to society. Documented mentions of

these enigmas can be traced back through history to as early as

Aristotle. And without doubt, millions of people have reached

their graves without ever experiencing the joys and pleasures

offered by the G-Spot.

The goal of this book is simple. We want you to learn, firsthand,

that both G-Spot orgasms and female ejaculation do exist

and can be evoked to bring about the ultimate in female ecstasy

and sexual enjoyment. More importantly, you’ll learn why these

two phenomena exist, how they’ve been overlooked countless

times in the past, and the important roles they play in the processes

of human reproduction and childbirth.

Through these pages, you’ll learn a proven and tested “10-Step

technique” that shows you how to find the G-Spot, how to stimulate

it, and how to drive your lover crazy with ecstasy. You’ll deepen

your understanding of the female anatomy while learning new

methods of rekindling the romance and sexual excitement in your

current relationship.

The G-Spot does exist. Through this book, you can prove it to

yourself, and your lover.

What’s the big deal about G-Spot

orgasms, anyway?

“My lover and I have great sex...why do we need to worry about

the G-Spot?”

If you’ve never seen or experienced a true G-Spot orgasm,

imagine for a moment, an orgasm that causes the whole vagina to

spasm violently, often contracting so tightly that it literally tries

to “force out” your finger or any object in the vagina. And imagine

that while these intense contractions are throbbing and pulsing

throughout the vagina, the vagina becomes very wet, often literally

ejaculating a stream or spurt of fluid with each contraction.

Imagine an orgasm that causes such intense ecstasy that even the

quietest and most controlled woman will yelp and buck and

thrash; one that makes normal “screamers” go dead silent—the

scream caught in her throat—a scream that if freed may wake all

the neighbors within a five block radius.

And imagine the satisfaction of never having to wonder: “Did

she just orgasm? Did she fake it, or was it real?”. But instead

knowing the instant her orgasm begins by clear physical signs

that occur involuntarily and accompany the orgasm.

This is the glory of a G-Spot orgasm.

But we don’t want you to take our word for it. We want you to

see for yourself.

Here’s what a few others had to say:

“I didn’t think orgasms like that were real. . . I thought they

only existed in romance novels. . .” — B. R.

“It was absolutely the deepest, most wonderful climax I’ve

ever felt! It was like warmth started in my very center and flowed

outward all over my body. I loved it!” — L. K.

“I thought I had wet the bed! And then (name withheld)

explained what had happened and I could hardly believe it finally

happened to me. . . If I have to wash the sheets every day for the

rest of my life, it’s worth it.”— T.J.

“I wanted it to last forever and couldn’t stand another second.

. . both at the same time. It was the greatest!” — M.J.J.

“After that, I’ll never let (name withheld) get away from me!

Our love life has never been better. . .” — K. A.

“She used to just lie there and moan through the whole thing.

It was frustrating because I never knew when she was orgasming

or if she even orgasmed. Thanks to your technique, there’s no

more guessing...” — T.P.

The Dire Truth

about Conventional Orgasms

While most men can go from “slightly-interested” to “fullejaculation”

and orgasm in an average of 3 to 4 minutes, orgasms

for women are often more elusive. On average, a women requires

15 minutes (or longer) of combined foreplay and stimulation

before orgasm is achieved. The reward: a clitoral or vaginal

orgasm lasting an average duration of 8 to 19 seconds.

In the early 1970’s, a detailed nationwide study showed that

nearly 12% of women never experienced any type of orgasm! The

same study showed that 16% could have an orgasm during intercourse

(with the addition of clitoral stimulation) and 19%

achieved a rare orgasm through intercourse alone. Only 26% had

an orgasm on a regular basis (30% when including those who

claimed to have vague “good feelings” in the vagina).

Couple this with the brief 8 to 19 second duration of an average

orgasm and you have a very dire picture.

Another segment of the study showed controversy over

“clitoral” orgasms vs.”vaginal” orgasms. The consensus showed

that clitoral orgasms (empty vagina) were largely considered

“higher intensity” than orgasms with vaginal penetration—but

there was a catch-22 factor. During clitoral stimulation and

orgasm, most women felt a strong desire to have an object in the

vagina. The problem with this “vaginal craving” was an immediate

decrease in pleasure if vaginal penetration was made.

Additional parts of the study concluded orgasm intensities

could range from questionable (“was that an orgasm I felt?”) to

pure ecstasy—but the high-intensity orgasms occurred much less

frequently. The study also showed that most women have intercourse

for the purpose of sharing emotional intimacy, while another

group’s primary motivation was to obtain the ever-illusive

orgasm. One study showed that about 1/3 of the women studied

enjoyed anal penetration while another 1/3 didn’t like anal penetration.

Another study showed that 21% of women desired daily

sex, while 18% —nearly the same amount—were satisfied with

sex 3 times per week. Other studies probed masturbation with fingers

versus objects, sex with the legs together versus spread, and

the preference of different positions during sex.

The relevance of this information is to elucidate the obvious:

we are all different and have different tastes and desires in a partner

and how we interact with that partner. We have different

needs, likes and dislikes. Secondly, it brings to light the sad reality

that many women never orgasm, and those who do aren’t always

satisfied afterwards.

But now there is hope.

Duration in the length of orgasm is one area where the G-Spot

leaps ahead.

Unlike the normal vaginal or clitoral orgasm, the G-Spot

orgasm lasts not a mere 8 to 19 seconds, but often lasts 45 seconds

— with common reports of 2 minute orgasms and rare

reports of orgasms lasting between 20 and 40 minutes! One man

reported:

“She kept orgasming as long as I was rubbing the spot. It

never quit or slowed down. We have a clock radio on our night

table and it went on for at least 45 minutes. I know that sounds

like an exaggeration, but it’s not. I was beginning to think it

might harm her in some way if I kept going. And I was ready to

explode any minute. Watching her thrash around in ecstasy and

feeling how warm and wet her [vagina] was against my fingers

was driving me crazy. Her [vagina] kept contracting and squeezing

and she felt as tight as a schoolgirl again. It was driving me

crazy. I love this G-Spot thing.”

A few women have reported needing to stop their partners

from continuing stimulation because the pleasure was “excruciating”

or “nearly unbearable.” One woman stated:

“The anxiety was overwhelming. At first I thought it would

never come and when it did, the ecstasy was almost unbearable.

It felt so wonderful I couldn’t stand it. I thought I might go crazy

from the pleasure. I wanted to keep going, but had to stop, both

at the same time. And when it was over, I was exhausted and

totally satiated. Total bliss doesn’t define what I felt. It’s not even

close.”

Beyond driving your lover crazy with long-lasting ecstasy, an

additional benefit of G-Spot stimulation may be a reduction in

risk for cancer and diseases in the female prostate (also known as

Skene’s paraurethral glands and ducts). While the occurrence of

female prostate cancer is low and seldom fatal, any reduction of

risk is still beneficial. According to many alternative health

experts and Oriental practices, massaging the prostate can drain

toxins and stress. In the book, The Prostate Miracle, New Natural

Therapies That Can Save Your Lifei, the authors discuss similar

means for cleansing the male prostate gland and releasing toxins.

Although the female prostate is smaller than the male counterpart,

the two develop from the same embryonic tissue. Because of

their similarity, one might hypothesize that stimulation of the

female prostate and the corollary release of fluids and cleansing

could offer the same benefits as male prostate stimulation. This

topic of women’s health deserves future research.

The 92% Factor

Using the technique provided in this book, an astounding 92%

of our respondents reported success within the first 3 applications

of the technique! This percentage includes women who previously

considered themselves either non-orgasmic or reported low occurrences

of orgasm.

In one survey we conducted, women were instructed to grade

“Vaginal”, “Clitoral”, and “G-Spot” orgasms on a scale of 1 to 10

(with 10 being the “most pleasurable” and 1 being “least

pleasurable”). Of the respondents who achieved successful G-Spot

orgasms, the average rating was a “10” (One woman claimed it

was “off the chart”)! The average rated clitoral orgasms was an

“8” and vaginal orgasms ranked third in pleasure intensity with

a “6”.

When asked to describe their G-Spot orgasm experience, we

commonly received the same four statements within most

descriptions:

1. “It was deeper than anything I’d felt before.”

2. “It felt very different from previous orgasms.”

3. “It was more fulfilling/satisfying than previous orgasms.”

4. “It felt ‘better’, ‘more pleasurable’, or ‘more intense’ than

other orgasms I’ve had.”

In addition, many women equated the G-Spot orgasm to a

“whole body” event, whereas other orgasms were “pelvic”. We

received many comments about feeling a “heat” that started deep

within “their core” and spread throughout their body. Coinciding

with this statement, many of the sexual partners (who administered

the technique) made comments such as: “she broke out in a

sweat afterwards” or “she was drenched and exhausted” or “she

threw off the covers”.

Many women also reported their first (noticed) “female ejaculation”

occurred with the G-Spot orgasm. One re-occurring

comment we received was: “I thought I’d wet the bed. . .”. We

have heard this comment over and over.

While G-Spot orgasms and female ejaculations are separate

entities, the two sometimes occur simultaneously. We’ll discuss

female ejaculation in greater detail, later.

Like finding a half-bloomed rose, you now have a glimpse of

the G-Spot’s glory. Soon the petals will unfold.

Why Does the G-Spot Exist?

Beyond the intense sexual pleasure the G-Spot is able to produce,

new studies are investigating the G-Spot’s value in blocking pain

during childbirth. In an article titled Beyond the G-Spot: Recent

Research on Female Sexualityii which appeared in the January 1999

Issue of Psychiatric Annals, authors Whipple and Komisaruk

state: “. . . a series of studies has demonstrated that self-stimulation

of the anterior wall of the vagina in women produces a significant

elevation in pain thresholds. . .” and “we believe childbirth would

be more painful without this natural pain-blocking effect...”.

This research (which has been replicated by other researchers)

shows the G-Spot’s value during childbirth. Because of this, we

feel that the physical purpose of the G-Spot is:

1. To ease pain during childbirth (as shown by Whipple and

Komisaruk).

2. To either enhance or provide sexual pleasure.

By stating “enhance” sexual pleasure, we are referring to

“non-direct” G-Spot stimulation. For example, when the penis

swells during normal intercourse, the increased girth of the penis

may partially stimulate the G-Spot and “boost” a woman’s sexual

enjoyment to the point she orgasms with her partner. If your lover

has ever said anything like: “You started swelling and hitting

something up in there that felt great...” you may now understand

what was happening. Likely, the partial stimulation of the G-Spot

enhanced her sexual pleasure.

By stating “provide” sexual pleasure, we are referring to direct

stimulation of the G-Spot. Which, as you will hopefully soon

learn, can provide a stand-alone unparalleled source of orgasm.

A Side Order to Go, Please

By following the technique outlined in this book, one can

obtain indirect rewards along the way. The Ten-Step system is

designed to teach G-Spot understanding and prowess, yet it also

incorporates the building blocks for enriching and strengthening

relationships.” Heightened intimacy” is a good example. We all

need a partner with whom we can share our hopes and dreams,

our fears and desires, our failures and our triumphs. We need

someone to laugh with and someone to help us forget the pressures

society heaps on our shoulders. Sharing intimacy and having friends

to confide in can be an important element of good emotional health.

“Spontaneous praise” is another suitable example. When we’re

dating that special someone, praise is a wonderful tool. It’s a

great way to evoke a smile, a word of thanks, or perhaps even a

kiss. We use praise to hint our feelings toward that person by saying

“I love this about you” or “I love that about you”. And because of

the smile it often evokes, we freely point out our mate’s beauties,

skills, or whatever qualities we admire in them. They smile, love

us for our admiration, and often return a like sentiment.

As the relationship progresses, however, we tend to withdraw

from praising our partner and she or he withdraw from praising

us. Offering praise becomes similar to giving part of ourselves

away: a silent forfeiture of power. It fosters feelings of inadequacy

because giving praise somehow makes us feel like “less” and the

other person like “more”. Beyond that, the lack of received praise

begins to gnaw at our own self-worth. We start second-guessing

whether our partner still admires the traits she or he once freely

applauded. We vow not to venture out on a shaky limb and praise

him or her if they no longer praise us. The same praise we once

used as a helpful tool has now become a weapon, and we set ourselves

up to have a “praise stand-off” with our mate, like two

petulant children pretending to be gunslingers.

With the stealth of a snake, a rift has split the ground between

us and our partner, widening with the passage of time, until we

are separated by an immense void.

But this need not be the case. As we know, the world can be a

harsh place. It continually beats us down. At times, the simplest

word of encouragement from our mate can bolster and fortify us,

giving us the strength to lift our chin and carry on. By recognizing

the fact that we need praise, it’s easy to understand that our mate

needs praise too, in all the same ways. And whom do we want as

the source of that praise: ourselves, or a stranger? What does it

really cost us to give praise? What might it cost if we don’t?

Like most things worthy of pursuit, the rewards you (and your

partner) receive along the way to the G-Spot—pleasure, tenderness,

open communication, increased sexual awareness and sexual

expression—will reflect the effort you extend.

One successful user of the technique had this to say:

“. . . Thanks so much for introducing me to the G-Spot and

sharing your wealth of sexual know-how. You have no idea how

beneficial your time and insightful comments have been in restoring

my marriage. Before reading your book, my wife and I were on

the brink of separating. Lovemaking had become an unimaginative

weekly ritual for us. The fires of romance that once blazed brightly

had dwindled to a pile of cool ashes. We spoke to each other only

out of necessity and both felt we had grown apart. Now, that has

changed. The knowledge you imparted has changed that. By following

your suggested steps, the doors of communication re-opened.

My wife and I discovered that we still have many common goals;

they were just buried underneath the headaches of everyday life.

We were both bored in the bedroom and had little desire to cuddle

or do anything that might lead to sex. Now, we’re like teenage

lovers again. Our relationship is renewed. We take walks together,

talk openly, and have adventurous sex daily (twice if we can manage).

It all started that first night I tried your technique. The seed for

new growth was planted. I (we) can’t thank you enough. ”—G. P.

If your relationship has grown stale and lacks romantic luster,

congratulate yourself for purchasing this book. You’ve taken a

positive step toward rekindling the fires of romance. And while

buying a book may seem insignificant, remember that knowledge

is a powerful tool. Sometimes the smallest spark can set off the

largest blaze.

The matches are now in your hand.

Blended Orgasms

A Recipe for Higher Ecstasy

“What are blended orgasms?”

Suppose for a moment that your mate mentally rates a clitoral

orgasm as a “7” and a G-Spot orgasm as a “10”. What would

happen if she felt both of these orgasms at the same time? The

answer is simple: she would experience an (off-the chart) blended

orgasm.

In the early 1970’s, Irving Singer touched upon the concept of

“blended” orgasmsiii. Thereafter, while studying the continuum

of orgasmic response and the corresponding nerve pathways,

Whipple and Perry validated, defined, and clarified the reality of

“Blended Orgasms”iv .

In layman’s terms, blended orgasms are two or more orgasms

occurring simultaneously (or in very close rotation). Blended

orgasms originate from multiple sources of simulation. For example,

if you perform cunnilingus as you stimulate your partner’s G-Spot,

she may experience a blended “clitoral/G-Spot” orgasm.

While the two obvious sources for blended orgasms are either

(1) “stimulation of the clitoris and G-Spot” or (2) “stimulation of

the clitoris and vagina”, we need not limit our thinking to only

these two combinations. An orgasm can originate from a variety

of sources. For some women, having the breasts massaged or

nuzzled is very pleasurable and can bring about orgasm. For others,

petting and necking (with or without breast stimulation) can

induce an orgasm. Others reported an orgasm during dreams,

while horseback riding, and even while dancingv. And for others,

mental imagery alonevi vii (without any physical stimulation) can

cultivate orgasm.

Opposite of this, as we discussed in the earlier segment, 12%

of women reported never experiencing any type of orgasm.

Others reported being able to orgasm through only one type of

stimulation, such as clitoral stimulation. Logic would therefore

indicate that not all women are likely to experience blended

orgasms—unless they find new sources or methods of becoming

orgasmic.

We hope the technique you learn from this book will be such a

source; a freshly bloomed rose, filled with sweet nectar.

To Orgasm, or Not to Orgasm?

That is the question many people ask themselves

during intercourse.

Because you purchased this book, it’s highly probable you

would enjoy seeing your mate experience a “blended orgasm”.

And it warrants mentioning here, your display of unselfishness

and caring is commendable. However, while the thought of seeing

our mate experience a blended G-Spot/clitoral orgasm may be

appealing, we must learn to “walk” before we can “run”.

As we learn to “walk”, the first mental step is learning and

accepting that people choose to orgasm. Deciding to orgasm is a

personal choice. No one can “give” or “will” another person an

orgasm—no more than you could “will” a stranger to remove

their clothing.

We each make individual choices concerning “if” or “when”

we will achieve orgasm—often without conscious deliberation of

the subject. For those who are highly orgasmic, the sheer act of

removing clothing (or allowing it to be removed) may mark the

decision. For others, the decision may not be concluded until

stimulation or coitus is underway and “the waters are tested”,

often mere seconds before orgasm. Others release their reservations

in layers. Like an autumn tree shedding its leaves, they

slowly drop inhibitions, as they grow resoundingly secure and

comfortable with the relationship. And yet others refuse ever to

relinquish control, usually from fear of self-humiliation, or to

avoid appearing too “wanton” or “loose”.

Along the way to making the decision, there are several determining

factors ensconced within the decision-making process. In

order to “let go” and orgasm, most people need to feel secure

with their partner. We need to feel good about ourselves, safe at

the location, and comfortable with what’s happening to our bodies.

These factors are more prevalent if we’re with a new partner

or trying a new experience. While “new” can be exciting, the

excitement is fueled by the suspense of not knowing what to

expect. And because we don’t know what to expect, we reserve

judgment until late into the process.

All of this is important to consider as you administer the GSpot

technique. As you may recall, one of the four most common

descriptions we receive about the G-Spot experience is: “It felt

very different from previous orgasms”. Because of this, at some

unknown point while you’re applying the G-Spot technique, your

partner will realize something new and very exciting is happening

to her. She will then have to decide whether “to orgasm, or not to

orgasm”.

Deciding whether or not to reveal the G-Spot technique is up

to you. If you tell your mate beforehand of your plans to administer

the G-Spot technique, you may set up to be a victim of

“orgasm anxiety” (discussed later). On the other hand, if she

senses something new and unknown is happening to her (while

you’re applying the G-Spot technique) she may “hold back” and

delay or inhibit the orgasm due to the uncertainty of what she’s

feeling.

It’s a catch-22 situation and you should remember this as you go.

We recommend that you don’t initially mention your plan to

administer the technique. Instead, be aware that at some point

during your administration, she will sense this “new and exciting”

wave of pleasure building within her. Watch for the signs of her

uncertainty. When you see these signs, begin reassuring her that

you know what’s occurring and understand it. (“I know what’s

happening to you. It’s okay. I’m here. Just enjoy what you feel”).

The same thinking holds true with blended orgasms. While we

encourage the pursuit of blended orgasms, don’t overwhelm her

by trying to make the first G-Spot orgasm a “blended G-Spot/

clitoral orgasm”. Take it one step at a time. After she grows

familiar with G-Spot experiences, gaining both confidence and

understanding, she’ll be better suited (if not eager) to explore the

bold world of blended orgasms.

Intimacy 101

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines the word “intimate” as:

“Marked by very close association, contact, or familiarity;

marked by a warm friendship; suggesting informal warmth and

privacy; of very private and personal nature.”

As illustrated through the above definition, people share intimacy

with, not only their lovers or sexual partners, but also with

close friends, family members, and even pets.

Since the subject matter of this book deals with inner-couple

relationships, most references to “intimate” or “intimacy” refer to

the bonding, topics of private and personal nature, or the aspects

of carnal knowledge that occur within a relationship.

This point is being clarified because it’s important to acknowledge

that intimacy need not be linked to sex. Intimacy is the sharing

of one’s innermost feelings and thoughts with someone we

trust. Not only does it erect temporary buffers to the outside

world, it also provides a brief respite from stress. It staves off

loneliness and promotes our self-worth. Conversations are “mindto-

mind”; intimacy is “heart-to-heart”.

The Phenomenon of Female Ejaculation

Beyond intimacy, one other clarification needs to be made

before we start covering the technique. Modern society tends to

propel the myth that G-Spot orgasms and female ejaculation are

the same occurrence. And while the two often do occur together,

it’s important to realize they are separate wonders—not one entity.

For simplification, we’ll explore this topic through a

“question/answer” format:

If G-Spot Orgasms and Female Ejaculation aren’t the same,

what exactly is “Female Ejaculation”?

Female ejaculation occurs when a women “ejaculates” fluid

(usually different than urine) from her urethra during sexual

arousal or orgasm.

Where does this fluid come from?

Surrounding the urethra and running to the neck of the bladder

lies a network of glands, ducts, and nerves called the “Skene’s

Paraurethral Glands”. As we mentioned earlier, these glands are

the female counterparts to the male prostrate. The Skene’s Glands

are the source of female ejaculate.

If it’s not urine, what is this fluid?

The fluid is typically described as “clear” or “milky”, having

little or no odor, and a sweet taste. However, as with male secretion,

the taste may change due to dietary intake or possibly as

part of the menstruation cycleviii.

The primary chemical makeup of the fluid is glucose, fructose,

prostate specific antigen (PSA) and prostatic acid phosphatase

(PAP)ix x xi xii. The fluid may also contain traces of urinexiii.

Interestingly enough, fructose is one of the components present

in male ejaculation. Its primary job is to mobilize the spermatozoa.

While it was once believed that male fructose was the sole propellant

of spermatozoa, the presence of fructose in female ejaculate

would evidence the contrary. Instead of passively waiting for

spermatozoa to “swim” to the egg, the female plays an equally

active role in the reproduction process by infusing her own fructose

and ushering the spermatozoa’s movement, thus increasing the

probability for successful fertilization.

Because of this, we feel the physical purpose of female ejaculation

is to aid in the mobilization of spermatozoa. And while it

may not be scientifically proven, it stands to reason that stimulation

of the G-Spot and the female prostate may be a beneficial

pursuit for couples facing problems with conception.

As another interesting note, early forensic medicine checked

rape victims (and/or spots on their clothing) for the presence of

acid phosphatase, to prove rape had occurred. Research on female

ejaculate has since proven this test has no forensic value since

female ejaculation contains acid phosphatase.

What causes female ejaculation?

Since the G-Spot encompasses the Skene’s glands and the

glands are caressed during G-Spot stimulation, fluid is often

released into the urethra as a result of G-Spot stimulation.

However, G-Spot stimulation is not the sole source of ejaculation.

Some women ejaculate with stimulation of the clitorisxiv xv.

Do all women ejaculate?

The evidence is inconclusive on whether all women have the

ability to ejaculate. If the presence of fructose is designed to play

an important role in reproduction, one might hypothesize that all

women should have the ability to ejaculate, barring those with

physical anomalies, removed Skene’s Glands, disease, or hereditary

disorders. However, in some studies researchers did not notice

expulsion of fluid during stimulation.

In the Secrets of Sensual Lovemaking, The Ultimate in Female

Ecstasy, author Leonardi states: “...a combination of physical

technique and psychological security were absolutely necessary

in order for a woman to have ejaculatory orgasms.” Many of the

accounts in Mr. Leonardi’s book indicate the need for a strong

emotional bond to be established prior to successful female ejaculationsxvi.

If this is true, it could explain why some laboratory

studies fail, whereas others (conducted in a more natural atmosphere)

can often succeed, especially those done by researchers

who willingly provide “in home” examination or testing.

(As demonstrated in the 10-step technique, we feel emotional

bonding is a key ingredient to success).

It has also been hypothesized that, because many woman are

reclined during intercourse or stimulation, the fluid is retrogradeejaculated

into the bladder and is later released during urination.

In The G Spot and Other Discoveries About Human Sexuality, the

authors state: “Some women may experience retrograde

ejaculation if the fluid shoots into the bladder rather than out the

urethra. xvii ”. This condition might be characterized by a

woman feeling a need to urinate after orgasm, but, when doing

so, only releasing a small amount of clear or milky fluid.

Along these lines, Cabello, author of Female Ejaculation,

Myth or Realityxviii, tested the hypothesis that all women may

ejaculate, but some may retrograde ejaculate and therefore might

be unaware of the ejaculation, since the fluid becomes mixed

with urine in the bladder and is later released during urination.

Of 212 completed and usable surveys we received in doing

research for this guide, 48% of women responding reported either

they did not ejaculate or were unsure if they had ejaculated. On

the opposite side of the gamut, 5% reported ejaculating before

orgasm and 47% reported ejaculating during G-Spot orgasm. Of

these 110 women who reported ejaculating, 101 reported the incident

was their first known ejaculation. Eight others stated they had

ejaculated in the past, while one woman informed us she commonly

ejaculates with stimulation of the breasts, clitoris, and vagina.

A 37-year-old (single) woman reported:

“The first time I slept with (name withheld), I thought I’d wet

the bed. It was very embarrassing for me because I really loved

him and wanted sex to be good for us. And it was good in ways

I’d never dreamed of. I’ve been having orgasms regularly since I

was 16 (years old) but nothing like this had ever happened. I’ve

slept with 7 different men and always considered my sex life as

‘good’ until this orgasm. Now I know what I was missing all

those years. This orgasm was very different and so much deeper

and better than the ones I’ve had before. (Name withheld) is a

definite keeper. . .”

Another woman reported:

“I didn’t know I could ejaculate. I’d heard of other women

ejaculating but had no idea that I could do it until my friend

applied your technique. It was quite an experience. . .”

Does the ejaculation always occur along with orgasm?

No.

In a study conducted by M. Zaviacic (et al.) in 1998xix, a

group of 10 women were studied who ejaculate through G-Spot

stimulation. Of the 10 women, they found that 2 participants ejaculated

within the first 1.5 minutes of stimulation, prior to orgasm.

Five other participants ejaculated after 4 to 8 minutes of G-Spot

stimulation (again prior to orgasm). And the three remaining participants

ejaculated with orgasm, after 10 to 15 minutes of G-Spot

stimulation.

How much fluid is ejaculated?

This is a controversial topic.

Most scientific studies gauge the average female ejaculation as

ranging between “a few drops to one-teaspoonful”— comparable

to the average volume of semen ejaculated by males. An example

of such appears in The G Spot and Other Discoveries About

Human Sexuality (recommended reading). The authors state: “In

the cases of female ejaculation observed by Whipple, Perry, and

their colleagues, only a few drops to about a quarter of a teaspoon

were usually expelledxx.”

On the opposite side of the spectrum, we have received reports

of women “drenching the bed” or producing “copious amounts”

of fluid. One man had this to say:

“She left a wet circle about a foot in diameter. We were both

amazed at how large the spot was. The sheets were saturated.

There was no foul odor. No noticeable odor in fact. But the bed

was too drenched to allow comfortable sleep.”

Another man said:

“Sometimes it just trickles out of her and sometimes it gushes

and leaves a big wet spot. It’s great if she’s on top because having

that warm liquid flow down over my testicles makes me [ejaculate]

almost instantly. We don’t mind changing the sheets afterwards.

It’s worth it.”

Another stated:

“This milky liquid squirted out of her and splattered between

her knees. It left a two-foot long wet streak on the sheets.”

And:

“She normally ejaculates between one-half cup to one cup.

But the first time [she ejaculated] it was more, maybe a cup-anda-

half.”

And:

“About a week after we started using your technique, we

bought a plastic mattress liner for our bed. You might want to

recommend this to other people, along with buying a couple of

extra sets of sheets. Otherwise, the center of the bed gets too wet

after a couple nights of fun.”

And:

“She literally drenched the bed. When it comes to volume,

women put men to shame.”

A woman stated:

“I don’t mind washing the wet bedclothes every day. This

orgasm is worth it.”

In Tom Leonardi’s Secrets of Sensual Lovemaking, The

Ultimate in Female Ecstasy, several of the interview subjects

indicated “large amounts of the fluid”. On page 114, one such

subject stated: “And the insides of her thighs were dripping wet. . .”

Another said: “She came and she squirted. It hit me in the arm.

It hit my arm and I’m not sure where the rest of it went. . . . from

my forearm all the way up near my elbow.”

In describing the event, Leonardi states on page 57: “At the

very least, her hot liquid will quickly seep out of her, running

down her buttocks and off her body. But most likely, the liquid

will physically fly from her vagina—2, 4, 8, even 12 or more inches

from her.”

The “larger volume” conjecture might also be supported by a

custom called kachapati, which was practiced by the Batoro tribe

of Uganda, Africa. According to a personal communication from

anthropologist Phil Kilbratenxxi, the kachapati was a rite of passage

for young women emerging from puberty into womanhood.

Before these young women were eligible for marriage, the older

women of the village taught them how to ejaculate. The term

kachapati literally means to “spray the walls”. One might conclude,

in order to “spray the walls”, a significant amount of fluid would

need to be expelled.

So how is it that skilled researchers report only a “teaspoonful”

or less while many people claim it’s more?

Considering that most female ejaculations occur in dimly lit or

near-dark conditions—and are coupled with the excitement of

lovemaking (and perhaps the novelty of a first-time event)—we

feel that some estimates of the fluid amount are exaggerated or

over-estimated. In example, if you take a teaspoon of water and

dump it onto a flat non-absorbent surface, the water will form a

circle approximately 3.5 inches in diameter. If you repeat the

same experiment, but cover the hard surface with an absorbent

piece of material, (such as a cotton bed sheet), the teaspoon of

water will soak outward and form a circle 8 inches in diameter.

Since many mattresses are treated with stain-resistant protections

such as ScotchGuard™ and are covered with heavy upholstery that

resists permeation, the bed linens often absorb (and diffuse) the

bulk of the liquid. Also, because air can travel through the weave

of many bed linens, the heat quickly dissipates and causes the

area to feel cool and saturated.

Some researchers feel that Urinary Stress Incontinence (USI)

may also play a role, as urine is sometimes released “as” or

“along with” ejaculate, thus increasing the volume. However,

other researchers argue against this, claiming that—because it is

physiologically impossible for a man to urinate at the moment of

orgasm—the same likely holds true for women. (This latter argument

does not account for women ejaculating urine prior to

orgasm).

What’s it all mean?

While the jury is still out on certain aspects of female ejaculation,

advancing research has played a valuable role in the advancement

and betterment of women’s health. In the past, many women who

described “ejaculations” to their physicians were misdiagnosed

with USI and were often directed to undergo “corrective surgery”

for the “problem”. Beyond the embarrassment brought on by their

“shameful condition”, some women faced the wrath of a spouse

who believed his wife urinated on him during intercourse! As

one can see, the plight of these women was unpleasant.

Fortunately, due to groundbreaking research by Addiego,

Holoman, Komisaruk, Molcan, Perry, Whipple, Zaviacic,

Zaviaciova, and other great researchers, acceptance of female

ejaculation is coming about.

Some Healthy Considerations

Most medical doctors agree that the therapeutic values of intercourse

far outweigh the risks, provided “safer sex” practices are

followed. During intercourse, muscles can receive exercise. Stress,

stored in the muscle tissue, is released from the body. In addition,

the physical stimulation and the movement during both foreplay

and intercourse force the heart to beat faster and breathing to

increase. This causes oxygen-enriched blood to be spread throughout

the body, replenishing cells and feeding muscles.

We’ve all likely heard the office water-fountain jokes that “soand-

so must have gotten lucky last night” because he or she

seems to glow and is unusually cheerful. These statements may

have medical validity since, like all forms of exercise, the release

of stress can brighten our disposition and help make the world

less gloomy and foreboding.

When engaging in intercourse, readers are urged to practice

“safer sex”. If you’re not familiar with “safer sex” practices, there

are a host of informative books available, such as: Safe

Encounters: How Women Can Say Yes to Pleasure and No to

Unsafe Sex (B. Whipple and G. Ogden, McGraw Hill, 1989) or

Safe Sex in a Dangerous World (A.Ulene, Vintage Books, 1987).

Your family physician is also a good learning source. Many

physicians have educational pamphlets available or can provide

information on sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and their

avoidance.

Contrary to popular belief, the risk of heart attack occurring

during sexual activity is very low. In a study performed with

patients who have suffered heart problemsxxii, only .09% cited

sexual activity as the triggering factor. Sexual orgasm has been

compared to “about the same energy required for climbing two

flights of stairs. . . or walking on a treadmill at 3 to 4 miles per

hour”xxiii. Compared to many other activities, the risk is low.

If you have a history of heart-related illnesses or other medical

condition (such as blood pressure or blood sugar irregularities),

you should check with your physician to learn safe guidelines.

Also, know your partner’s health. It’s a wise practice to discuss

his/her health status—any sexual diseases and any other health

concerns—before engaging in intercourse.

A Brief History of the G-Spot

There’s an adage that states: “To know where you’re going,

it’s helpful to know where you’ve been.” This statement holds

true with the G-Spot. By cultivating a deeper knowledge and

understanding of the G-Spot’s history, you increase your odds for

success using our ten-step technique.

We owe a great debt to the visionaries of our world. Not only

to those who live today, but to those who have come and gone.

Throughout time, gallant individuals have seen beyond common

perceptions and silently shouldered the duty of discovering truth.

In many cases, after enduring countless hours of research to validate

their cause, these selfless individuals stepped forth buoyantly to

declare their findings—only to have their hopes bludgeoned by

ridiculing peers.

Christopher Columbus might serve as a fitting example. At

age 14, he became a sailor. For many years, he studied known

maps of the world; likely doubting the world was “flat” as was

commonly believed. Later, as his theories of a “round world”

manifested themselves, he conferred with European scholars

(who also believed the world was round). Gaining conviction, he

set forth to prove his theory. Yet when he announced plans to sail

to the East Indies by crossing the Atlantic toward the west, he

was persecuted by “flat thinking” peers.

As we all know, Columbus sailed and prevailed. His ship did

not fall off the edge of a flat Earth and into oblivion. And

although he never reached his original destination, he discovered

something greater in the process—a bold new uncharted world.

Like most great discoveries, the G-Spot and the reality of

female ejaculation both follow a similar history. Throughout history,

brave and dutiful visionaries have arisen time-after-time to confirm

the existence of this uncharted sexual continent, often bearing the

ridicule of skeptical peers in the process. Aristotle may be one of

the earliest recorded examples by observing that women expel

fluid during orgasm. In the seventeenth century, a Dutch

anatomist Regnier de Graaf described a “female ‘prostatae’ or

corpus glandulosum” which expulsed fluid, enhanced libido, and

caused pleasure. In his findings, he stated: “The function of the

‘prostatae’ is to generate pituitoserous juice which makes women

more libidinous. . .” and “the discharge from the female

‘prostatae’ causes as much pleasure as does that from the male

‘prostatae’.xxiv ”

Long after Regnier de Graaf’s work, Alexander Skene, M. D.,

George Caldwell, M. D. , John W. Huffman, M. D., Samuel

Berkow, M. D., and several others individually studied these

glands and/or female ejaculations and released their own findings.

At the end of World War II, a German gynecologist and obstetrician

named Ernst Gräfenberg collaborated with an American

gynecologist and obstetrician by the name of Robert L.

Dickinson, M. D. In 1950, Gräfenburg wrote about “...an erotic

zone could always be demonstrated on the anterior wall of the

vagina along the course of the urethra...xxv”. According to the

findings, this erogenous zone swelled when stimulated and

“swells out greatly at the end of orgasm.”

In the 1970’s, while treating women suffering from Urinary

Stress Incontinence (USI), John D. Perry, Ph.D, and Beverly

Whipple, R. N., Ph.D, made an important discovery that led them

to the G-Spot. Typically, women suffering from USI have weak

or atrophied pelvic muscles. The strength of these muscles can be

measured through biofeedback and can be strengthened by teaching

women Kegel exercises (a technique for strengthening the

Pubococcygeus or “PC” muscle). However, Perry and Whipple

discovered that some of the women who supposedly suffered

from USI had very strong pelvic muscles. Furthermore, these

same women with strong pelvic muscles often stated the only

time they (accidentally) lost fluid through their urethra was

during intercourse.

Much like Columbus’s epic journey, setting forth for the

Indies and discovering America instead, Dr. Perry and Dr.

Whipple discovered their own land of milk and honey, which they

aptly named “The Gräfenburg Spot” in honor of Dr. Ernst

Gräfenburg’s early research.

At the 1980 national meeting of the American Association of

Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists, and the 1980 international

meeting of the Society for the Scientific Study of Sex,

Perry and Whipple presented their findings about the G-Spot and

Female Ejaculation. Later, in 1982, along with Alice Kahn Ladas,

they published a book explaining The Gräfenburg Spot, Female

Ejaculation, the Importance of Healthy Pelvic Muscles, and New

Understandings of the Human Orgasm. This popular long-standing

book is titled The G Spot and Other Discoveries About Human

Sexuality and is still in print as of this writing.

Since the release of The G Spot and Other Discoveries About

Human Sexuality, more has been learned about the G-Spot and

female ejaculations. As each new doorway to knowledge is

unlocked and opened, we find yet more another doorway awaiting.

The more we learn, the more mysteries await us. History unfolds

while no one is watching.

The Technique

Let’s get started!

Okay. Now that you know a little about the G-Spot, you’re

probably wondering how you can test the G-Spot technique

first-hand.

Let me commend you if you’ve read through this far and

haven’t skipped ahead. One of the most frequent complaints

women voice about poor lovers is having a partner with “vaginal

objective”. This “vaginal marksman” wants to kiss once or twice,

perhaps then fondle the breasts, then skip any other delays and

move right toward the clitoris or vagina. If you’ve taken the time

to read this far, you’re likely not a “Vaginal Marksman”. (They

are now reading “step 10” and will have to back up, re-read, and

likely will never get this straight. A year from now they’ll be the

ones responsible for rumors that the G-Spot doesn’t exist). You,

on the other hand, will find the truth since you have displayed the

two most important attributes to actually being successful in helping

your lover achieve a G-Spot orgasm. These are: patience and

self-control.

Stop for a moment and look at the big picture in logical terms:

if the G-Spot orgasm were something easy to achieve and could

be stumbled upon, nearly every woman on the planet would know

what it is and how to do it. Right? Most would have found this

spot (as they do their clitoris, during exploratory masturbation), and

would be enjoying its pleasures. But as we know, nothing could

be further from the truth. Even in this day and age, the G-Spot is still

arcane, obscure, misunderstood, and a topic of curiosity.

As evidence of this, we will look at an internet educational

service called KISISS (Kinsey Institute Sexuality Information

Service for Students). KISISS allows Indiana University students

to ask questions about sex in an anonymous fashion. After each

question is answered, both the question and answer are posted for

other site users to read. Interestingly enough, at the time of this

writing, the #1 most frequently read question is: “What is the GSpot

and Where Can I Find it?xxvi” . The sheer fact that college

university students (and visitors) read this question more than any

other question lends us insight. Clearly, it shows that the G-Spot

is still a mystery.

Like dark ships passing on a night sea, most people repeatedly

overlook the G-Spot. As many women pass through life, they

mature, explore their own bodies, masturbate, have intercourse,

bear children, and often never find their own G-Spot. All the

same time, the partners who shared in the lovemaking have also

overlooked this special spot.

Beyond this, up until two decades ago, many of the very doctors

who examine women daily (gynecologists and obstetricians)

were unsure of the G-Spot’s existence.

In the defense of these physicians, we should consider that (1)

the G-Spot cannot be seen without dissection of the anterior vagina

wall and (2) it is virtually unnoticeable until stimulated. Since

gynecologists and obstetricians are not in the practice of stimulating

their patients, it stands to reason they would fail to notice the spot.

With all this in mind, if you truly want to find the elusive G-Spot

and help your partner feel the absolute best orgasm she’s ever

felt—a spasming, screaming-and-thrashing-in-ecstasy G-Spot

orgasm—you’ll need to have patience and self-control.

Follow the 10 Steps implicitly. After you learn and become

familiar with the G-Spot orgasm, you’ll be able to use the technique

very quickly and effectively to help your lover produce results

much of the time. But like any worthwhile endeavor, the technique

takes practice. The more you do it, the quicker you’ll learn to

identify certain “signs” given by the female body that allow you

to move on to the next step of the process.

The same is true of your partner. If you have a steady sex partner,

after she loses her G-Spot virginity she will also learn to read

her body signs and will be able to hit the G-Spot climax sooner,

and in a wide variety of positions.

Step 1

Priming

Although it’s possible to help a woman achieve a G-Spot

orgasm on the first sexual encounter, the surest bet is with steady

partners who are familiar and comfortable together. This is

because of emotional qualities. In order to fully let go, many

women need to feel safe, loved, and secure with their partners’

sexual prowess and understanding.

Recommendation number one: As was said earlier, it’s wise

not to mention the G-Spot orgasm to your partner. If you tell her

you want to “try something new” you’ll be fostering expectations

in her that may be counter-productive when you actually get

down to lovemaking. She’ll feel the need to “perform” without

understanding the details. Therefore, she will be apprehensive and

edgy—when it’s helpful to be exactly the opposite: relaxed and

comfortable.

Instead of telling your lover about your covert plan, set up the

opportunity to “show” her. Sit down with your lover and tell her

that you’d love to take her out for dinner or a movie, then return

home and spend the evening making slow passionate love. Be

sure to mention the second part of this plan so your lover doesn’t

get the wrong impression—that the two of you are going to spend

the evening out together. This will do two things for you. One,

your lover will appreciate your candor and the romance of the

gesture; two, it will prime her for lovemaking. If your relationship

is fair or better, she’ll probably be thinking about the lovemaking

long before you order supper or choose a movie.

Beyond this preparation, be sure to groom yourself prior to

your date. Because much of this technique involves stimulation of

the vagina, be sure your fingernails are short, clean, and smooth

to avoid damaging the soft tissues of her body. Wear your favorite

cologne. Look and feel your best.

Step 2

Foreplay

After you wine and dine her, talk about old times and those to

come, perhaps give her flowers, brush the spinach out of your

teeth from dinner, maybe slow dance in the living room and eventually

work your way to the bedroom, be sure to remind her of

how beautiful she is and how much you enjoy being with her.

Boost the intimacy. Talk to her. Remember that for many women,

foreplay is mainly emotional. Spend lots of time on the emotional

bonding. Strengthen your relationship and bond with her.

Step 3

More Foreplay

Most likely, with a few more kisses, some light petting, and

additional compliments, the two of you will be stripping each

other as if your clothes are on fire—falling into the bed together

as if it were the only pool of water in the world. And this is when

you need to gently take control. If this is your steady partner and

you’ve primed her the week before your “date”, she’ll likely be

wet and ready to fall into your standard lovemaking. Seize control

by telling her you want to “take it slow” this time. Remind her

that you want to make slow love to her—that you want to spend

some time pleasing and savoring her and making her feel loved.

She’ll love you for that. Ask her to lie back and make herself

comfortable. Remind her that you love her and remind her how

beautiful you think she is. If she has beautiful breasts, tell her so.

If it’s her eyes, her long legs, or her full sensual lips that you like,

tell her so. Praise is a key element within any relationship. It

costs nothing to give but can be priceless when received. It helps

us maintain a healthy image and self-worth while making us feel

respected, desirable, and loved. If you love your partner, praise

her. Tell her what you love about her; not just her physical beauties,

but her emotional qualities, skills, or whatever it is you truly admire.

By doing this, you’re promoting a deep sense of intimacy and

comfort while keeping her aroused. Kiss her. Nibble on her lips.

Kiss her throat, the lobe of her ears, her eyelids—all of which are

very erotic and arousing spots for the majority of women.

In the case of most women, by the time you’ve spent a few

minutes kissing all about her face, nibbling the lips, kissing the

eyelids, perhaps blowing in her ear, and dragging your lips over

her neck and down to her shoulders, you’ll probably notice her

beginning to inch upward or pressing your face toward her

breasts. . . arching her back. If she’s forward, she may seek you

out with her hand or guide your hand to her breast. She may even

tell you she wants you—but don’t sell off the million-dollar

orgasm that cheaply. A critical element here is keeping all your

attention, physical and emotional, focused at breast level or above.

Step 4

Teasing

So here you are, in bed together, probably naked by this point,

very aroused and ready. You’ve (both) been thinking about this

moment ever since you first mentioned the evening out. This is

the part where both patience and self-control are beginning to

come into play—don’t sell yourself short and give in!

Lavish her with kisses. If she enjoys having her neck kissed,

by all means oblige. If she enjoys breast stimulation, nuzzle and

fondle and tease her breasts. At this point you can “bend” the rule

of focusing all attention at the breast level (and above) by rubbing

her stomach. This is an important step in the arousal process. The

purpose of this step is to increase blood flow in the pelvic area.

Work your hand back and forth across her stomach and down her

abdomen very slowly. You don’t want her to think you’re targeting

the vulva, so move slowly and randomly until you’ve reached the

area just above the pubic hairline. Absolutely DON’T drop your

hand any lower—even if she tries to move it there—even if she

tells you she wants you and starts pulling you toward her.

The reason you don’t want to touch any lower than the

abdomen (yet) is because it breaks the bond you’re working to

build. Some women have experienced the “vagina marksman”

and may be emotionally turned off when interest is transferred to

the vagina (if done too soon). When this occurs, it often signifies

the “end” of the bonding process and the “beginning” of sex. It

can flick as quickly as a light switch. The mist of enchantment lifts.

Continue to nuzzle her breasts, kiss her, nibble at her neck, or

whatever shows your love. Your goal is to continue increasing the

emotional bond between you, and she will unconsciously give

you signs as the strength of the bond deepens. Remember—

you’re about to provide the stimulus for an orgasm that is unlike

anything she’s ever felt. In order to reach it, she’ll be slowly

transferring her trust to you. She’ll need to feel cherished, safe,

and adored in order to do so without holding back.

As you nuzzle at her breasts, kiss her neck, nibble her ears, or

whatever it is that turns her on, you are watching for two “go

ahead” signs before moving to step five. The first is the most

important. You must continue stimulation until she is virtually

smashing your head into her chest, breathing heavily, tugging at

you as if she’s trying to pull you inside her. Once you become

aware of this, start watching (or sensing) for the second sign:

movements in her hips. The hips never lie. . . and you want her

thrusting them upward. If she’s not thrusting, arching, or twisting

her hips, she’s not ready. So continue nuzzling and sucking at her

breasts or otherwise stimulating her until her hips move. If need

be, move your hand a little lower on her abdomen to brush the

upper edge of the pubic hair as you rub. Before long, both of

these signs will come.

Step 5

The “Go Ahead” Sign

Once you have the two “go ahead” signs of arching hips and

tugging, absolutely don’t break contact with her breasts, chest or

face. Keep your head and face at chest level or above. This gives

the unspoken message that “you’re still with her”—not merely

moving on to focus on her vagina and get your next lay.

With the hand you’ve been using to massage her abdomen,

slowly trace down to rub her upper and inner thighs—again,

without touching the vagina and setting off the “vagina marksman”

alarm. If you’d like, reach around and squeeze the lower

half of either buttock in a teasing way. Massage the muscles gently;

working the flesh actually tugs at the edge of the vulva, helping

to open the labia and helping her become more ready and wanton.

This massage also increases blood flow in the pelvis, arousing

and heightening sensitivity.

Trace your fingers up and down her thighs, provocatively

circling her “magic triangle”. Brushing the edges will ensure her

hips continue to thrust.

Above all, remember to focus on her and hold the emotional

bond you’ve established.

Step 6

Hovering

By now she should be thrusting her hips wantonly and moving

in a way to actually encourage you to touch her vagina. If she’s

bold, she may try to massage herself or try to guide your hand (or

other part) to the area. However, don’t let her. If necessary remind

her lovingly that you want to spend more time just touching and

savoring her. If she wants to massage herself, encourage her to

massage her breasts. Moreover, encourage her simply to just lie

back and enjoy.

Your next step will be to move your hand above her womanhood

and hover it there, just brushing the tips of the pubic hair. If she’s

really aroused, this will drive her absolutely crazy. She’ll sense

your hand and the heat of your hand and should impulsively arch

her hips toward your hand. Expect this reaction and raise your

hand to avoid contact.

While hovering, you may even tug at the hair lightly. You need

not tease her in this way for more than 2 or 3 minutes, but be sure

to allow your hand to hover above her womanhood long enough

for her to show some type of acknowledgment—even if that’s

only a moan.

Many women harbor inhibitions about being verbal or displaying

their sexual needs or desire. The underlying significance of the

“hovering” is two-fold. Not only does it increase your lover’s

arousal, but it also encourages her to react and helps to break

through any inhibitions she may be struggling with. It should be

abundantly clear that you are deliberately (almost mercilessly)

teasing her, searching for a reaction, and this gives her a justifiable

reason to react without compromising her ego or sacrificing dignity.

You’ve compelled, almost forced, her to react. And for many

women, once they have reacted the first time and break the barrier,

it’s easier and acceptable to react again.

After you’ve hovered and received a reaction, allow your fingers

to trace up and down the flesh on either side of her vagina.

By saying “flesh”, we do not mean the labia but rather the

mounds on either side of the vulva. Touch it very lightly. This is

an extension of the tease and should further fuel the fires of arousal.

Continue this for a while and slowly change the feather-light

touches into a soft massage. Few people realize there are muscles

on either side of the vaginal opening, so take a little time and

gently massage these muscles, relaxing them.

After you’ve massaged these muscles for a moment, trace her

vagina with your fingers, using a finger on either side of her vagina

to lightly pull back and spread open the labia. The labia are a

very sensitive and erogenous area, yet many women report they

are overlooked during lovemaking. So spend a little time here,

flattening the genital lips and tracing them with your fingertips.

Gently tug at them and spread them open. This sense of the vagina

being “open” will often trigger a high “vaginal craving”, and

she’ll want that void filled.

If you’d like, you may even stroke the clitoris lightly—but

don’t linger there as the clitoris can be very disruptive to firsttime

G-Spot orgasms. If you’ve thought of the clitoris as the primary

stimulus point for a woman, you’ll want to re-train your

thinking. From this point on, think of the G-Spot as the main

stimulation and the clitoris as either a “booster” or a secondary

stimulus. Remember that the women polled report that G-Spot

orgasms are significantly more intense than clitoral orgasms, both

in duration and fulfillment.

As we discussed earlier, “blended orgasms” are an exception

to this rule and will certainly warrant future exploration. But for

tonight, this special first night, we’ll avoid the clitoris unless she

really needs an extra boost.

In some ways, the G-Spot and the clitoris are like

internal/external counterparts. G-Spot virgins, who have spent a

lifetime thinking of their clitoris as their primary stimulation,

may get so involved trying to give themselves a clitoral orgasm

that they lose track of the G-Spot stimulation you’re trying to

build. While it has not been scientifically proven, our belief is

that “single-task” persons can only focus on one form of internal

stimulation. . .just as they can only focus on one form of external

stimulus at a time. Logical thinking would lead to the conclusion

that “multi-taskers” are more likely to succeed at blended

orgasms.

Whether or not this is the case, we advise you try to keep your

lover away from her own clitoris for this night. Touch it enough

to tease, and then move on.

Bear in mind through this whole process, never break contact

with her breasts or above. . . returning frequently to kiss her lips

and ward off her advances if she tries to pull you onto her.

Step 7

Locating her G-Spot

By now there should be no doubt she’s ready. She should be

moaning (at least quietly), thrashing her hips, arching her back,

and urging you on. And as you finally dip your finger into that

moist warm wetness, your patience and self-control will be tested

to their maximum endurance. But don’t give up. . . you’re

almost there!

Slide your finger into her very slowly—dipping in very shallow

at first to allow your finger to become moist—pulling out and

dipping in again. As you do this, dip a little deeper each time,

keeping light pressure on the front wall of the vagina—all the

while be careful not to scratch those sensitive folds of velvet with

a fingernail.

When touching a woman, many lovers make the error of

plunging a finger as deeply into the vagina as possible and wiggling

the member around, not realizing that aside from the hidden

G-Spot, most of the sensitive nerves lie within the first two inches

of the vagina’s throat. Hence, the adage: It’s not what you’ve got

but how you use it. So don’t make the error of plunging. Your

goal here is to tantalize the outer nerve endings while allowing

your finger to become sufficiently lubricated to visit hidden depths.

If your partner is not well lubricated, you may want to use a

suitable lubricant. Her being “dry” does not mean she is not aroused.

Diet, hormonal levels, medications, and menstrual cycle can all

affect vaginal lubrication. Wetness is not a valid gauge of arousal.

Finally, slide your index finger into her, skimming the upper

wall. This is the critical process of locating the G-Spot, so while

you’re still kissing her, teasing her nipples or sucking her breasts,

concentrate for a moment on what your finger encounters.

Study the following diagram. This may help you better understand

the location of the G-Spot when the time comes.

With most women, about one-and-one-half inches inside,

you’ll feel a slightly textured area of skin (it feels somewhat the

same as the roof of your mouth). Just beyond this textured area is

the G-Spot, hidden in what feels like a “valley”. If you go too far

and pass the G-Spot, you’ll feel a smooth “plateau” that is flat for

an inch or two, then curves inward toward the cervix opening

(which is also a very erotic spot if caressed lightly—although it is

hard to reach).

If you go too far and reach this plateau, back up to the bottom

of the “valley” and rub the down-slope between the valley and the

edge of the textured area.

In most cases, the G-Spot feels like a small bean or a very

small nipple. At other times it can’t be sensed at all. Just like

breasts or nipples, some women have small G-Spots and others

have larger ones. (The former is especially true of postmenopausal

women).

Once you’ve found the G-Spot (or are in the vicinity where it

should be, if it can’t be felt), begin rubbing very lightly in a circular

manner, at the rate of about one revolution per second. The

pressure you apply should begin with about the same degree of

pressure you would use to write your name on a steam-fogged

mirror. You can use one finger, or two, whichever feels most comfortable

to you and best matches the size of your partner.

Step 8

Stimulating the G-Spot

Okay, you’re finally there, rubbing the G-Spot. . .so why isn’t

anything happening?

When you first touch the G-Spot, don’t be surprised if you

don’t get an immediate reaction, just continue rubbing between

the bottom of the valley and the back edge of the “textured” area.

In most cases, women will make comments such as “that feels

good” or “stay right there” or “that feels so different”. But if you

don’t get any response at all, don’t panic. Think of the G-Spot as

being similar to the nipple. When you first touch a nipple it is

soft and only relatively sensitive. But as blood flows to the area

and the nipple grows erect and aroused, the sensitivity increases

in a dramatic flourish. The G-Spot is much the same. As you

begin to caress it in a slow, circular manner, you will soon feel

the area swell. It may become more porous and have an almost

grainy feel. And it will most definitely become very sensitive.

If the G-Spot is massaged without prior arousal, many women

find it uncomfortable. This is one of the key reasons that some

people fail to find the G-Spot. Half-hearted pioneers often search

for a spot that gives a woman great pleasure. Yet if these seekers

blindly happen upon the G-Spot (without proper arousal) the

woman may report minor discomfort or an “uncomfortable feeling”,

steering them away. This is an important point to remember

in the future. If you try to move through the G-Spot technique

faster in the future and skip over steps, the G-Spot may not be

properly aroused when you reach it. Always follow the steps and

watch for the “go ahead” signs from your partner as you move

from one step to the next.

Rhythm is the absolute key here. As long as you maintain a

steady rhythm, slow-building “waves” of ecstasy begin to wash

in. Each wave that comes will be a little higher in intensity than

the previous, and they will begin to cascade and surge faster and

faster, until a point is reached that, just as one wave is beginning

to fade, the next is already swelling.

If a women tries to stimulate her own G-Spot, her proclivity is

often to stroke the area faster and firmer (and faster yet) as the

waves grow more intense, trying to “force” a wave to crest and

break over into the undying ecstasy she senses just beyond. The

problem is, she can over-stimulate the G-Spot and inhibit the

orgasm. This is critical knowledge to consider when you hear

your lover’s pleas to move faster or firmer. Be cautious about giving

in. Maintain a slow even rhythm at first.

On the other hand, if you’ve been stimulating her G-Spot for

ten minutes (or longer) at the one-revolution-per-second technique

and she can’t “crest over”, it may be time to try a different

touch. Remember that all women are different. Some women do

need a slightly firmer touch. For others, a side-to-side or up-anddown

finger movement is more effective than a circular one.

Some women prefer stimulation with one finger while others prefer

two or more. For yet others, slight variations in the speed are

more effective. . . or a combination of any of these factors. This is

where practice, judgment, and experimentation will come into

play. We first recommend using the circular, light, one-revolutionper-

second method. Our research has shown that it is the most

effective. When many lovers were urged to move faster or firmer

and the demand was obliged, the orgasm often faded instead of

growing. When the original slow and light touch was resumed,

success soon followed.

The good news is, there appears to be a “point of no return”

with G-Spot orgasms. After her first experience, your lover will

likely (ardently) convey this to you. Once she reaches the point

where “waves” of pleasure are building and cascading rapidly, the

orgasm becomes nearly inevitable.

We asked one woman if she could stop a clitoral or vaginal

orgasm from occurring. She replied: “Why, yes. Certainly.” In discussing

her G-Spot experience, the same woman stated: “I

reached a point where I couldn’t stop it from coming, even if I

wanted to!”

When you finally get to witness the extreme ecstasy of your

lover thrashing and screaming in the throes of pure ecstasy, it’s

very difficult not to become excited yourself and begin rubbing at

the G-Spot with great enthusiasm. When some lovers see their

partner in such ecstasy—especially if she has her first (visible)

ejaculation—they often experience orgasm themselves. However,

if you can maintain control and keep up the G-Spot stimulation,

her orgasm may continue perpetually. This is how some couples

state they can maintain an orgasm for up to 20 or more minutes!

One couple even reported an orgasm that lasted 40 minutes and

only stopped because neither partner could stand any more.

Step 9

The “Big-O” Draws Near

Even if your partner hasn’t mentioned it yet, at this point she

is likely aware that something quite different from a vaginal/clitoral

orgasm is beginning to grow inside her. She may even feel some

apprehension because of not knowing what’s happening. So as

you continue to stroke the G-Spot, be sure to reassure her that

you are there, with her, in support of her, and remind her that you

love her. Tell her of how beautiful she is and how much you

enjoy taking this time to bring her pleasure. Not only will this

make her feel emotionally safe and secure and help her climax

sooner, it will also help her relax and lessen any guilt she may

feel because of all the unselfish time you’re spending. If she complains

about feeling guilty, tell her you’ll gladly let her return the

favor another time, but tonight belongs to her.

In most cases, aside from the initial, slight swelling of the G-Spot,

you won’t notice any changes inside the vagina. When dealing

with women who are new to the G-Spot orgasm, you’ll often find

the muscles in your forearm begin to burn before you feel the

first vaginal contraction squeezing against your finger. Most of

our survey respondents state “20 minutes” of G-Spot stimulation

was required the first time. So again, it’s time to utilize that

patience and self-control. You haven’t come this far to stop now.

And if you do stop now, you’ll likely disappoint your lover (who

is aware of this massive ecstasy burgeoning inside her).

As the G-Spot orgasm grows near—The Big-O—the first

thing you’ll notice is a constricting of the vagina that begins with

one of her “waves”. With the next wave the vagina will constrict

again, fade, then quickly return with the next wave, building and

building to a point where the vagina is so perpetually constricted

the muscles often spasm and quiver. Sometimes, the constricting

is so tight it will eject your finger! About the same time you

notice the first constriction, you’ll also likely notice a greater

sense of wetness. In fact, some women become very wet, to the

point the suction of the finger causes slurping noises and a clear

fluid actually begins to weep from the vagina. As we discussed

earlier, this is the wonder of female ejaculation.

If this occurs, you may notice the consistency of this fluid

differs from the normal milky lubricant produced by the vagina.

Your finger may loose it’s slickness, and since the area is so

sensitive, you may want to pause and quickly apply an approved

sexual lubricant. Have some lubricant available before things get

started. As a general rule, the slicker your finger stays, the better.

Step 10

You’re There!

You’re there! As the wetness increases, the vagina will begin

to convulse violently. As we mentioned, some women constrict so

hard it forces the finger out of the vagina! By this time your

lover will undoubtedly be thrashing wildly and screaming “Don’t

Stop! Don’t Stop! Oh, God don’t Stop!” or “Faster! Faster!

Faster!” But regardless of how frantic your lover becomes,

regardless of how excited you get by watching her ecstasy, try to

control your motions.

As she finally crests over the top, most women will scream. It

differs from the normal orgasm scream, being more of a guttural

“expelling” sound rather than the gasping breaths of standard

orgasms. If you can picture the grunting scream of a woman giving

birth, her head hunched forward, clenching her knees, you’re on

the right track. . . and at the same moment she cries out, if she

hasn’t already done so she may ejaculate. This is especially true

of G-Spot virgins. While it defies the findings of scientific

research, many of our respondents mention the first G-Spot

orgasm as the “wettest”—almost as if the fluid has been locked

up for years and you’re opening the dam, setting it free.

Our theory is that many of these couples simply don’t “work”

as hard on subsequent sessions as they did during the first G-Spot

experience. Emotional bonding or the duration of stimulation may

also play roles in determining the volume of fluid produced and

the intensity of the orgasm. While these subjects are worthy of

future exploration, they need not detain us here.

At this point, simply keep your finger moving until your lover

asks you to stop or the orgasm fades. Typically, she will ride that

wave for one or two full minutes, and the orgasm will lessen.

When you see this event, you will be completely rewarded for

all your “work”. Just watching her writhe and knowing the intense

pleasure you are helping to provide is a great reward in itself.

Most men will want to join her as they sense this wave fading.

The change from a finger to a swollen penis may delight her. . .

and by this point, having watched her thrash and scream, feeling

the warm wetness on your finger and hand, your self-control will

likely be gone. So as long as she’s willing, jump in and enjoy the

orgasm with her. Feeling a wet, contracting vagina sucking at the

penis can be an experience neither of you forget!

Afterwards

The Little Death

Directly after the orgasm, a few women pass through a phase

called “the little death”. This phase is a 5 to 10 second period in

which the woman may appear to faint and/or seems to stop

breathing. If this occurs, don’t panic. Women who have passed

through “the little death” frequently state they were so overwhelmed

with pleasure they “floated in delirium” for a brief period.

Other women may have a tendency to “pant” briefly before or

during the orgasm, resulting in either hyperventilation or

hypoventilation. In either case, a combination of the tremendous

release of stress, sudden slowing of the heart, and a re-direction

of oxygen-rich (or suddenly depleted) blood cells can bring about

“the little death”.

After 5 or 10 seconds, your lover should dreamily open her

eyes. When you ask if she’s okay—and you should—she’ll likely

tell you everything is fine, that she was simply enjoying the

moment.

If your partner does actually faint and remains unresponsive

for more than 15 or 20 seconds, you may have a medical emergency

on your hands and should contact medical assistance immediately.

Again, as a responsible party, it is your duty to know your partner’s

health status before engaging in sexual activity.

Sharing the Experience

In one survey, we asked women to express how they felt after

their G-Spot experience. Women responding to this survey were

instructed to indicate such by either “writing in” a comment or by

choosing among (one or more) multiple-choice selections.

Of these respondents, an overwhelming 97% indicated feeling

“Joyous/Elated” after their first G-Spot experience. Other leading

answers were: “Lovey/Romantic”(89%), “Thankful” (84%), and

“Satiated/Fulfilled” (82%).

While the vast majority of responses and comments were very

favorable, an average of 47% also indicated feeling “embarrassment”

and/or “curiosity” intermixed with other feelings. A few

(3%), cited their feelings of embarrassment stemmed from

becoming too “verbal” or “expressive” during the sexual episode.

Yet a much larger group stated the embarrassment arose from fear

they had “wet the bed” or “lost bladder control” during orgasm.

In some of these cases, women stated they had no idea

females could ejaculate and therefore concluded they had “wet

the bed”. In other cases, women indicated awareness that “other”

women could ejaculate, but previously considered themselves

“non-ejaculators”.

One tell-tale comment we frequently received was:

“I knew other women could ejaculate, but I didn’t know I could.”

As conscientious partners, it’s important to be aware of this

information. If your lover ejaculates during G-Spot stimulation,

she may fear she has “wet the bed” and may hide or avoid

discussing her “problem” due to personal embarrassment.

Undoubtedly, she will feel bad about herself and equally bad

about what’s happened, even if the experience brought her great

pleasure.

To thwart any hidden tensions from festering and rearing their

heads in the future, be sure to talk openly with your partner about

your first mutual G-Spot adventure. Discuss the phenomenon of

female ejaculation. Learn how she feels about it: what she knows,

or doesn’t know. Reassure her that female ejaculations are physiologically

normal. Reaffirm that they are natural and shouldn’t be

a source of embarrassment. Be open and honest. If you enjoyed

it, tell her so. If it excited you, tell her so. If you’re ready to go

again, tell her so. Promote sexual expression. Explore. Try new

positions. Be creative. Make it fun and loving.

Above all, make it good for both of you.

Self-Application

In today’s market, there are many available sex-toys designed

to stimulate the G-Spot. Among these toys are vibrating eggs

(that can be inserted into the vagina), weighted balls that are

inserted and worn inside the vagina (during common or sexual

activities), and curved vibrators specifically designed to reach the

G-Spot.

However, women do not need toys to enjoy what the G-Spot

can offer. Self-stimulation is possible after finding a position that

comfortably allows access.

While a few women can manage to self-stimulate in a reclined

or supine position, most will find a squatted or sitting (with knees

apart) position more accommodating.

Why? The answer is simple. Though it may be more comfortable

“lying down”, reaching the G-Spot (while in this position)

requires a very flexible wrist, long fingers, and a short vagina.

There is also a second benefit to the “squatted” or “sitting”

position. Upon first-time stimulation of the G-Spot, some women

feel a sudden sensation of needing to urinate (discussed later in

the “Problem Shooting” section). This can occur even if the

woman has recently emptied her bladder.

To assuage the worry of accidental urination, we recommend

self-stimulating while either squatted in the bathtub or seated on

the toilet. These positions allow G-Spot access without the fear of

“accidents”. In addition, lubrication can be freely used, again

without the worry of creating a “mess”.

When self-stimulating, take as much time as needed to heighten

arousal levels. Whether it’s reading a sexy story, fantasizing,

playing with sex toys, or simply massaging the breasts and body,

do whatever raises your arousal and makes you feel that “ache”

or “emptiness” within your vagina.

Once the vaginal craving begins to mount, you may begin

exploring for the magic spot described in the earlier steps. At first

touch the G-Spot may produce only mild pleasure. This is normal.

However, as you continue to massage the area it will begin

to swell and become more prominent.

Some women report that pushing down on the pelvis, just

above the pelvic bone, helps in locating the G-Spot. When you

believe you’ve located your special spot, move slowly. Whether

you’re using one finger or two, we recommend moving your fingers

in a slow, lazy circle, as if you were tracing the rim of a

nickel. Experiment. Try a light pressure at first, then a firmer

touch. Tease yourself as you go. Make it deliciously slow and torturous.

And above all, don’t overlook the pleasure you feel along

the way by rushing to the destination. Make the journey along the

G-Spot pathway erotic and pleasing.

Exploring Other Possibilities

Before we expound on this topic, take a moment and congratulate

yourself again. Stemming from the newly acquired knowledge

you’ve gained from your investment in this book, you’ll find

yourself constantly aware of the G-Spot during all phases of foreplay

and lovemaking. And because of this awareness, you and

your partner will quickly learn to adjust and angle yourselves to

promote G-Spot stimulation and derive greater pleasure during

normal intercourse—something you would have never imagined

prior to reading this book.

“How can a man derive more pleasure due to the G-Spot?”

one might ask.

If you’re male and you’ve seen a G-Spot orgasm, the answer

to this question is blatantly obvious. For most males, the thought

of having the penis inside a wet, spasming, tightly contracting

vagina during G-Spot orgasm has unlimited appeal. And as you

and your partner grow more familiar with the G-Spot, you may

soon be able to cultivate G-Spot orgasms using the penis.

As an added benefit, as your partner grows more familiar and

comfortable with G-Spot orgasms, she’ll be able to attain them

with greater speed, more reliability, and in a variety of coital

positions, thus including the G-Spot in other realms of lovemaking,

forging ahead toward blended orgasms.

“So where should we start?” you might ask.

As we mentioned in a previous section, there are a variety of

sex toys available for stimulating the G-Spot. Most of these can

be used by couples, as well as by oneself. Beyond the joys these

toys offer, couples can also experiment with G-Spot-friendly

coital positions.

“What are G-Spot-friendly coital positions?”

These are sexual positions that promote contact between the

G-Spot and the penis. While there are a variety of G-Spot-friendly

positions, the favored position is commonly referred to as

“woman on top” position. In this position, the male lies on his

back with legs slightly parted and extended flat. The female then

straddles him, facing forward. This position is favorable because

it is “face-to-face” and allows expression, kissing, nuzzling, and

stimulation of the breasts during intercourse. It also allows the

woman to angle her hips so the penis contacts her G-Spot. By

leaning forward or backward, the woman can adjust the pressure

of the penis against the G-Spot.

A second G-Spot-friendly position is a variation of the “missionary

position”. By placing a thick pillow (or two pillows)

beneath the buttocks of the female (so she’s lying with head

down-hill), the penis will contact the G-Spot during entry.

G-Spot/penis contact also occurs (in the missionary position)

when the male kneels of sits on folded knees, with his body

upright of nearly upright. Or if the female places her calves or

ankles on the male’s shoulders as he enters her.

Another position is “doggy-style”. If the male stands and the

female bends at the waist at a partial angle (such as leaning forward

with the hands braced against a wall) the underside of the

penis will contact the G-Spot. For couples who are near the same

height and enjoy sex in the shower, this is a very friendly position.

However, the angle depends greatly on the male’s penis.

While some penises stand straight out during erection (at a 90

degree angle to the body), others tend to stand more upright with

the penis head near the abdomen. In the case of the latter, the

woman must stand nearly erect (or the man must lean forward)

for G-Spot contact to be made.

Beyond these, there are numerous other positions that are GSpot

friendly. One couple reported their favorite position is with

the woman sitting atop the washing machine, while the man

stands facing her. They stated that during the spin cycle, the

machine caused her G-Spot and vagina to vibrate against his

penis, bringing both of them great pleasure and multiple climaxes.

They also stated that if she faced the washer and leaned forward,

the machine would vibrate against her clitoris while he entered

her from behind.

Another couple stated they enjoy using a thin G-Spot vibrator

with ample lubrication. As the woman neared climax, she would

withdraw the vibrator and move it to her clitoris as her spouse

entered her, allowing them to climax together.

Endless possibilities abound as you and your partner explore.

And as you sample each pleasure, remember to also savor what

you feel along the way. Take time and make it fun. Enjoy what

the G-Spot can offer both of you.

Problem Shooting

Pain or Discomfort

If at any point your lover expresses pain while stimulating her

vagina or G-Spot, stop the stimulation and schedule an appointment

with her gynecologist. Although the G-Spot can cause very

slight discomfort if massaged when not aroused, it should not

cause true pain.

If she expresses feeling minor discomfort, try applying an

approved sexual lubricant to prevent irritating the G-Spot’s surface.

Be sure you’re not rubbing the surface to vigorously. Also,

be sure your fingernails are smooth and cut short.

If she still feels pain or discomfort, she may suffer from a

medical condition such as endometriosis, pelvic inflammatory

disease, or a host of other potential causes. So a check-up with

the gynecologist is in order.

Inability to Reach Orgasm

In rare cases, women simply can’t attain the G-Spot orgasm.

They’ll reach a point were they are close, where the “waves” are

building and fading and building and fading, but they simply

can’t crest over. This may be a physical problem but is most likely

psychological. If this happens with your lover, the first step is to

reassure her that you’re there. Make emotional bonding your

number one priority.

Second, if you haven’t done so already, pause long enough to

lubricate your hand and her vagina. Having ample lubrication can

make an incredible difference.

Third, if you’re absolutely sure she can’t achieve the G-Spot

orgasm, even with extra lubrication, break the “hand-abovebreast”

rule and try massaging the clitoris while you stroke her

G-Spot. Be patient and understanding. And if your attempt for a

G-Spot orgasm fails, you may wish to help her achieve a traditional

clitoral or vaginal orgasm. Retry the G-Spot orgasm on another

occasion. Afterwards, read the section titled “Emotional Aspects”

and then re-read the 10 steps to make sure you’re following the

instructions to the letter. You may even want to discuss G-Spot

orgasms with your lover. Some women simply won’t allow themselves

to “lose control” without understanding what’s happening

to their bodies.

Above all else, remember that orgasms are emotionally driven

for most women. Talking, kissing, holding, reassuring, and building

trust are each as important (sometimes more) than the physical

stimulus.

The Urge to Urinate

Upon initial stimulation of the G-Spot, some women feel a

strong and urgent need to urinate. This can be either a legitimate

need or a “ghost sensation”, depending on whether her bladder is

full, partially full, or empty.

In the case of a full or partially full bladder, the pressure being

applied near the urethra and bladder neck can bring about a real

need to urinate. However, if the bladder was emptied recently, the

sensation may originate from G-Spot stimulation.

Many women report feeling the “ghost sensation” upon the

first few incidences of G-Spot stimulation. If ignored, the sensation

usually abates and is replaced with erotic sensations. As a

general rule, with repeated exposure and remembering to empty

the bladder before intercourse, most women learn to get beyond

this unpleasant sensation.

If your lover can’t escape feeling “ghost sensations” after several

attempts of G-Spot stimulation, a visit to her physician or

gynecologist may be in order.

Orgasm Anxiety

Some couples set themselves up for failure through a condition

we’ve dubbed “Orgasm Anxiety” (OA). This condition occurs

when a person tries to “force” or “rush” an orgasm and inadvertently

inhibits the orgasm from occurring. OA frequently occurs

in people displaying certain behavior patterns: “Goal Seekers”

and “Performance Givers” are the two most common.

Our definition of a “Goal Seeker” is a person who focuses

strictly on achieving orgasm, placing little emphasis on the pleasure

to be experienced along the way. “Goal Seekers” often express

feelings of sexual frustration if they don’t climax during each

sexual encounter. Feelings of guilt, inadequacy, or selfishness

may arise if they need additional stimulation after the partner has

already climaxed—and any of these feelings can inhibit orgasm,

thus perpetuating the problem. Goal Seekers who race their partner

to orgasm and either “rush” or “try to force” the orgasm, suffer

from OA.

Opposite to “Goal Seekers” are the “Performance Givers”.

PGs are known for “faking orgasms”. While some people do not

feel the need to climax for their own satisfaction, they may feel

the need to orgasm to please their partner. It may be their partner

feels inadequate if the “Performance Giver” doesn’t climax;

therefore, a “Performance Giver” can develop OA even though

they don’t require orgasm for their own benefit.

OA is a good subject to discuss candidly with your partner.

Don’t let “Goal Seeking” or “Performance Giving” steal your

sexual enjoyment. Talk to your partner about each of you enjoying

more pleasure along the path of lovemaking. Since it’s very

unlikely that you’ll both achieve orgasm at the exact same

moment, every time you make love, discuss your feelings of

needing or giving stimulation after the other has climaxed.

Discuss the importance you each place on climax. You may be

surprised by what you learn.

He Said / She Said

One common problem between couples is a misinterpretation

of “Foreplay”. This misinterpretation comes about because men

often think in physical terms while women often think in emotional

terms. For many men, “foreplay” marks the physical acts

which preface intercourse: kissing, touching, massage, fondling

the breasts, vaginal or clitoral stimulation, cunnilingus, etc. . .

These acts physically “ready” a woman for the “main event”:

intercourse and orgasm.

For many women, “foreplay” is primarily emotional with the

physical stimuli being secondary. Women often view foreplay in

wide and encompassing terms. Foreplay may range from spending

an evening together, to talking, to sharing hopes and desires, slow

dancing, or simply holding hands while walking through the mall

or watching TV. At some undetermined point, foreplay becomes

“Lovemaking”.

Consider this example:

Wife: “I’m almost afraid to kiss him. It’s like one kiss leads us

right to the bedroom. . .”

Husband: “She always complains that I jump right into it, but

I don’t. . . I kiss her, play with her breasts, massage her womanhood,

and give her plenty of foreplay before we ever start. . .”

This example clearly demonstrates the different perceptions.

The “wife” feels there is no foreplay or intimacy because there

was no emotional bonding prior to the physical. To her, the husband

“jumps right into sex” because he starts at the point she perceives

as the threshold of “lovemaking”.

On the other hand, the husband is frustrated because he understands

his wife’s need for “foreplay” and feels he has tried to fulfill

the need through physical stimulus (his concept of foreplay).

If any of this strikes home, be happy about it. Recognizing

and accepting the problem is 95% of the way to resolve. What’s

important to realize is we can’t glorify one of these needs while

condemning the other. Neither can be deemed right or wrong.

They are simply differences.

If you sense there may be confusion about foreplay in your

relationship, have a candid chat with your partner about her

needs. Be sure to share your needs with her, too. You may be

surprised to learn how easily you can accommodate each other’s

needs while incidentally enriching and deepening your relationship.

Even if you don’t feel there’s a problem in your relationship, it

may help you to “shoot down” any troubles before they arise.

The Emotional Aspect

In the world of accounting, there’s an adage that goes: “If you

torture the numbers long enough, they’ll tell you whatever you

want to hear”. “Truth” is much the same way. It can be distorted,

twisted, omitted, hidden, or fashioned to whatever suits us best. If

we manipulate the truth long enough, we’ll eventually convince

ourselves to believe whatever variation we’ve manufactured for

the sake of our own emotional comfort. We can convert the real

truth into a “falsehood”. In straightforward terms, we often lie to

ourselves and don’t mind doing so if it shields us from the emotional

pinpricks of life.

As we all know, the problem with self-deception is that the

real truth has a nasty habit of haunting us. The truth doesn’t care

what we think of it. Unlike us, it has no ego to bruise. It is simply

“the truth”, like it or not.

Of women we’ve polled, the leading cause cited for the inability

to obtain orgasm (of any type) was a lack of “emotional intimacy”

being established. In another study, when women were

asked: “What is it about sex that gives you the most pleasure?”,

the leading answer was “emotional intimacy; sharing feelings

with a loved one”. (This is especially true of Performance Givers;

their motive for intercourse is emotional bonding.) Second and

third rankings went to “touching and sensuality” and “orgasm”.

With such answers as “pleasing him”, “cunnilingus”, “clitoral

massage”, “fellatio”, and “the excitement” ranking far near the

bottom of the scale.

These two studies revealed two very simple truths: (1) that the

lack of needed emotional intimacy can prevent many women

from climaxing, and (2) that emotional intimacy is the engine

driving most women’s desire for intercourse.

If your lover was unable to reach a G-Spot orgasm, the most

likely reason is she didn’t reach a level of deep comfort. This is

one of those nasty truths that most of us don’t want to face, since

it pains our ego. On the other hand, it’s better to bear the pain and

own up to the “possibility” and tackle it head-on, rather than lie

to ourselves. . . only to have the ugly truth rear it’s head again.

Whether your relationship is new or old, there is hope. The

efforts you have put forth will not go unrewarded. If your relationship

is new, it may be that she hasn’t yet established a comfortable

level of bonding with you. Perhaps she has reservations

left over from a previous relationship. Be patient. Earn her trust.

The positive factor is, you’ve lavished a wonderful evening on her

that will certainly leave a favorable and romantic impression.

She’ll undoubtedly greet you with a wide smile the next time

you meet.

If your relationship is more established, you may have overwhelmed

your partner with an uncharacteristic amount of tenderness

and bonding. She may have been expecting you to “drop a

bomb” at any moment and simply couldn’t completely relax. This

is especially true if sex has recently been a ritual.

So what are you waiting for?

Talk to your partner. If you enjoyed the evening tell her so

and ask how she enjoyed it. If you both agree that you mutually

enjoyed it, this is the perfect opportunity to plan for the next

time. Chances are, next time she’ll be more relaxed and

you’ll succeed.

Tips From Experienced Users

While the 10-Step Technique has proven effective for most

people, it’s important to recall that we are each individuals. We

each have different likes and dislikes. We each have distinct

perceptions of life, personal experiences, our own spiritual views,

and subtle idiosyncrasies that make us unique. Like snowflakes

falling from a winter sky, we are the same when viewed collectively,

yet individual when examined more closely. We are “who

we are”, and no one is exactly the same as any of us.

Because of this, we encourage you to adapt the 10-Step

Technique to best serve the needs of you and your partner. Carve

your own niche. Be creative and adventurous. Make it upbeat and

fun. Be romantic and spontaneous. But above all, be the person

your partner fell in love with. Be the unique person you are.

Below are comments and tips shared by users of the 10-Step

Technique. In some cases, these individuals blazed their own

pathways to G-Spot adventure. Adapt what you can and enhance

your own G-Spot experience:

“My wife and I both work corporate jobs. After working 10

hours a day, fighting traffic during frantic commutes to and from

work, then getting through supper, housework, yard work, and

putting up with the day-to-day headaches of life, my wife and I

are exhausted by late evening. By 8:00 PM, we’re both ready to

sit back, relax, and unwind, then go to bed so we can do the

whole thing over again the next day. Often, we’re too tired to

even make love.

Because of this, on our ‘date night’ I surprised my wife with a

special treat. On Friday morning, I sent her flowers at work with

a note to expect a ‘very special and romantic’ evening at home. I

took the afternoon off, cleaned the house, made some preparations,

and had a candlelight dinner waiting when she walked in

from work. After the dinner, I prepared a hot bath and loaded the

bathroom with scented candles. While she soaked and relaxed in

the tub, I cleaned the kitchen, put on soft music in the bedroom,

lit more candles there, and sprinkled the bed with rose petals.

When she finished her bath, I led her to the bedroom and gave

her a full-body massage with her favorite aromatherapy oils. I

started with her back, then the backs of her legs, then her feet. I

spent an hour or more just massaging and teasing her. It was a

great turn-on for both of us. By the time I finished the massage,

she was relaxed and in a casual state. The atmosphere was

romantic, and we were both aroused and in a sexually comfortable

state. It was the perfect lead-in to the latter steps of your

technique. From there, everything happened naturally.” - J.P.

“My girlfriend and I use the flavored body lotions you can buy

through adult catalogs. We like the types that feel hot when you

lick or blow them. She loves it when I tie her down, blind-fold

her, and then spread the lotion on her breasts and all over her

vagina. It drives her crazy when I suck her breasts and rub the

lotion on her clitoris and G-Spot. Sometimes I even alternate

between the lotion and an ice cube to really make her scream.” -

W.R.

“The key to success is the presence of romance. It’s much easier

to orgasm when you’re feeling loved and connected with your

partner.” - A. P.

“Sometimes the muscles in my forearm cramp-up while I’m

rubbing her G-Spot. I’ve found that keeping a G-Spot vibrator

next to the bed is a good idea in case my hand cramps. The secret

is to buy a thin one. Some of the vibrators available are so big

that when she starts contracting they become uncomfortable.” - K. R.

“The great thing about the G-Spot is you can do it nearly anywhere.

On our first ‘date night’, I was really eager and started

fingering my wife and massaging her G-Spot during the movie.

She was moaning quietly and orgasmed within five minutes. It

was exciting for both of us because we were doing it in public.” -

Anonymous

“My wife and I like to lie on our sides in a 69 position. I can

perform cunnilingus and massage her G-Spot while she gives me

head or massages me with lotion. It drives us both crazy.” - R. G.

“Before we learned your technique, I had seriously considered

having my breasts augmented because my husband tended to

ignore them. I think that reading your book helped him grasp the

importance of kissing and fondling my breasts. Whether a

woman’s breasts are small or large, it’s usually very pleasurable

having them nuzzled and played with. I know several women who

feel this way. Stimulating the breasts is an important part of lovemaking

for me. Thanks for emphasizing this in your book.” - C. S.

“It’s critical that foreplay start long before you reach the bedroom.”

- Anonymous

“At first, my wife had a lot of trouble with the false sensation

of needing to urinate when she neared orgasm. We got beyond

this by doing it in the shower.” - C. H.

“If you want a thrill, have her lie on her back. Lie on your

side facing her. Have her throw her nearest leg over top your legs

so you can rub her G-Spot and slide your [penis] inside her at

the same time. That way, your finger is massaging her G-Spot

and your [penis]! When she starts contracting, it will drive you

both crazy.” - D. J.

“Keep a fresh towel and lots of lubrication in the bedroom.” - D. T.

“The clitoris can really distract a women. Stay away from it

the first few times you use the technique. You’ll have time for it

later.” - R.B.

“For a real treat, try having her lie on her back on a table or

counter. Have her bottom positioned near the edge. If you squat

in front of her, you can hold her labia open and watch as she

orgasms and ejaculates. It’s amazing to see the juice flow down

your hand as her vagina contracts and sucks on your finger.” - T. W.

“I had a lot of misconceptions before I read this book. I

thought I could always hit a women’s G-Spot with my penis.

Although it stings the ego, it’s better to realize you were wrong

than continue being wrong.” - L. J. T.

“My wife uses a vibrator on her clitoris while I massage her

G-Spot and suck her breasts. Her orgasm is strong enough she

sometimes faints afterwards. She loves it.” - T. P.

“I love seeing my wife in a teddy, a garter, thigh highs, and

high heels. I’m a leg and breast man and that ensemble is a real

turn-on for me. However, before I learned your technique, I had

to beg my wife to dress up for me in her ‘play clothes’. Now she

meets me at the door in her ‘play clothes’ every day after work.

Thank you.” - D. L.

“The first time she came, it looked like she was about to give

birth. She hunched forward and all this fluid shot out of her and

splattered on my arm. I didn’t believe in the G-Spot until that

moment. Believe me, it’s real.” - T. J. S.

“If you don’t succeed the first try, don’t give up. It’s worth it

when it finally happens. And it will eventually happen when she’s

ready.” - F. S.

An Informative Interview

with a

Renowned Sex Researcher

A note from the author regarding this interview:

According to The Merriam-Webster Dictionary (Pocket

Books), the word “philanthropy” is defined as:

“an effort to promote human welfare; a charitable act or gift;

(or) goodwill to fellowmen...”.

When delving deeper into philanthropy’s meaning, a synonym

encountered is “altruism”, which is defined as:

“an unselfish act performed for the welfare of others”.

While “philanthropy” and “altruism” are very similar in meaning,

a subtle difference does exist in their meanings and usage.

“Philanthropy” places emphasis on the “act” of helping others. In

other words, when we donate our time or money to a charitable

organization, we are performing acts of “philanthropy”. Being a

philanthropist can make us feel better about ourselves and may

provide either public recognition or a nice break on our yearly taxes,

possibly both.

Like philanthropy, “altruism” also entails a donation of our

time or money in a manner that benefits a group, community, or

humankind in general. However, altruism takes the concept of

philanthropy to a higher level because it is performed without any

desire for self-recognition. Altruism is very unselfish. Anonymous

donations are altruistic acts, and in our present day “me-me”

world, such acts are rare, commendable, and

morally refreshing.

I have touched upon “philanthropy” and “altruism” because

the interview subject for this section displays both of these

admirable traits and characteristics. While wishing to remain

“anonymous”, he or she unselfishly donated their own time and

effort...purely for the sake of insuring that you, the reader,

received accurate information. And because of my profound

respect for “Anonymous”, even though I wish to share recognition,

I have sworn to protect his or her identity. I can only say that

“Anonymous” is a world-renowned leader in the fields of sexology

and sexual research. And that disclosing his or her identity would

add instant creditability to this book. He or she is widely considered

an expert in this field, if not “the” expert of the field, and I would

urge readers to regard his or her interview answers as reliable and

well informed.

The Interview:

AUTHOR: I’d like to begin the interview by thanking you on

behalf of myself and readers for sharing your time and your

wealth of knowledge. Your unselfish generosity is commendable.

ANONYMOUS: You’re welcome.

AUTHOR: The first question I wish to pose is a preface to the

overall G-Spot experience: what elements do you feel are important

for a woman to achieve a G-Spot orgasm?

ANONYMOUS: A woman has to be comfortable with her body,

comfortable and willing to communicate with her partner, and has

to be willing to experiment with different positions of sexual

intercourse. Acceptance of self is very important. A woman also

has to be aware that she is responsible for her own orgasm, and

no one can give her an orgasm.

AUTHOR: If we can, let’s break that down a little more by

examining an “orgasm”. Exactly what is an orgasm?

ANONYMOUS: It’s important to distinguish that in men,

orgasm and ejaculation are two different phenomenon and are

controlled by two separate nerve pathways. We are just beginning

to learn more about the neurophysiology of sexual response and

sexual behavior in women. As individuals, we say we know what

an orgasm is, but I’m not sure we know what it is. In layman’s

terms, there’s a stimulation of nerve pathways, a buildup of tension,

and then a release of muscle tension. And you do not have

to have physical stimulation for orgasm to occur. This can also

occur with mental stimulation.

AUTHOR: With that in mind, how do G-Spot orgasms differ

from clitoral or vaginal orgasms?

ANONYMOUS: There are physiological differences in that with

stimulation of the G-Spot, the uterus pushes down into the vagina,

the introitis of the vagina opens and there is a bearing down

sensation. With stimulation of the clitoris, the uterus pulls up, the

end of the vagina balloons out, and there are contractions in the

outer third of the vagina. Women report that an orgasm from GSpot

stimulation feels deeper inside, whereas an orgasm from clitoral

stimulation is more localized in the genital area.

AUTHOR: Do you feel that female ejaculations and the G-Spot

coincide?

ANONYMOUS: Not necessarily. In some women they are correlated,

in others they are not. In one of the early research articles

published on this, research showed a test subject had ejaculation

from clitoral stimulation and from G-Spot stimulation.

AUTHOR: Do all women ejaculate?

ANONYMOUS: Most women do have some expulsion of fluid

from the ducts and glands into the urethra. And this can occur

during clitoral stimulation or vaginal stimulation or G-Spot

stimulation. The fluid goes either into the bladder or out of the

urethra as ejaculation. This has been documented by Dr.

Francesco Cabello of Malaga, Spain.

AUTHOR: What is known of the fluid women expel during an

ejaculation — where is it stored, what is it’s chemical makeup or

nearness?

ANONYMOUS: It comes from the female prostate gland, which

surrounds the urethra and has ducts into the urethra. It is made up

of glucose, fructose, PSA, and PAP.

AUTHOR: What health benefits or risks surround G-Spot

orgasms?

ANONYMOUS: The obvious benefit is it feels good. Risks

could be that someone trying to find it could cause trauma to tissue

with long finger nails or improper stimulation or not getting feedback

from the woman. Also, stimulation of this area produces a

strong natural pain blocking effect.

AUTHOR: About how far inside the vagina is the G-Spot?

ANONYMOUS: The G-Spot is found about half-way between

the back of the pubic bone (which is on the roof of the vagina)

and the cervix, and it’s along the course of the urethra. You have

to push into the upper vaginal wall to feel this area as it swells.

Use a “come here” motion with your fingers to stimulate the area.

It’s really hard for women to feel it on themselves unless they

have a short vagina and long fingers, because you have to bend

down, push up, and push in... although there are instructions on

how to find it on yourself. It is difficult to say how far inside the

vagina you have to feel because the G Spot is felt through the

upper vaginal wall, not on it, and each woman is different.

AUTHOR: What would you tell people about finding the G-Spot?

ANONYMOUS: I don’t want to see people set up on finding the

G-Spot, or male multiple orgasms, or female ejaculation, or

imagery orgasm as a goal they have to achieve. We’re all unique

individuals. We all have different tastes in terms of the clothing

we choose to wear, the foods we choose to eat, the people we

choose to be with. I think it’s only natural that we have different

tastes in what we like sexually. And some women may not find

this area sensitive or erotic. Or it may be that someone is not

pressing hard enough on the area, because you have to use quite a

bit of pressure pushing up through the vaginal wall to feel the

area swell. Or they may have long fingernails or rough skin that

causes the women to feel uncomfortable.

What’s important is we need to be open and aware and help

people find whatever is pleasurable for them, whether that be G-Spot

stimulation, clitoral stimulation, or stimulation of other erotic

areas. And more importantly, we should enjoy the overall experience

and what’s felt along the way, not just focusing on achieving

an orgasm.

What we need to do is enjoy the experience, not just strive for

an orgasm.

AUTHOR: What would help women to learn more

about themselves?

ANONYMOUS: Men are given permission to touch their penis

when they urinate. But for women it’s more difficult. Many

women get the message as a young child: “don’t touch down

there”. And it’s very difficult for these women to learn about their

own bodies because they have been given negative messages

about touching their genitals. And you can’t learn about yourself

without exploring and touching your genitals and without touching

other parts of your body. So women need to learn to be comfortable

touching their body for pleasure.

AUTHOR: What will happen if all women become orgasmic?

ANONYMOUS: There’s so much more to sensuality and sexuality

than orgasm. And women are often orgasmic now. But that’s

not the end-all. That is not it. It’s the relationship, the communication,

the caring, and the intimacy that are so important. And

don’t be threatened by a woman’s sexuality and sensuality, she’s

going to enjoy it and you enjoy her enjoying it.

AUTHOR: What can people do to increase their sexual response?

ANONYMOUS: I think it’s important for women to be aware

that they can take control and do some things that will help themselves...

not only in terms of mapping their bodies and being

aware of what provides them with pleasure. They can use the

Kegel exercises. The Kegel exercises are those that are sometimes

taught around the time of childbirth, before or after, to increase

the strength of the PC muscle. By increasing the strength of this

muscle, we find that there is a positive correlation with how

strong that muscle is and a women’s orgasmic response. That is,

women who have very weak muscles usually don’t have orgasms,

where women who have particularly strong muscles often have

multiple orgasms. This was documented by Graber and Klein-

Graber in the 1970’s.

To identify the muscle to use with the Kegel exercises,

become aware of the muscle you use to cut off the flow of urine.

You may want to test the strength of your Pubococcygeus or PC

muscle before you start the exercise program. Put two fingers into

the vagina, yours or your partners, open them up like scissors, and

then try to close them with your muscles. Don’t be surprised if

you can not do that.

Start off the exercises slowly, contracting and relaxing the

muscles you use to cut off the flow of urination, slowly building

up the repetitions to 100 times per day. Then in a month, repeat

the test by inserting two fingers into the vagina and trying to

squeeze the fingers together to see if the muscle is getting

stronger. This is a good way for women to take control of their

health and their sexual response.

Not only is it good for women to do, they are also good for

men. Men can do the same exercise to increase sexual pleasure

and orgasm. Men have reported that their erections are stronger

after strengthening the PC muscle. By increasing the strength of

this muscle and then squeezing the muscle at the moment of ejaculatory

inevitability, some men can learn to have multiple

orgasms through preventing ejaculation. Here again, it’s important

to realize that ejaculation and orgasm are two separate phenomenons

and need not occur simultaneously.

AUTHOR: If a woman does Kegel exercises, will her vagina

be tighter?

ANONYMOUS: It may become tighter. As the strength of the

PC muscle increases she may feel tighter during vaginal intercourse.

And also, a very good way of doing the exercise is with a

penis inside the vagina. You’re then doing the exercises against a

resistance device, which is always more effective. And also, the

male will have pleasure and enjoyment from the stimulation of

the penis by the PC muscle.

AUTHOR: How can a man test the strength of their PC muscle?

ANONYMOUS: There’s a very fun way for men to test the

strength of their PC muscles. First of all, you want to do this in

private. When you start out, before you do the exercise, put a

tissue over an erect penis and lift it up. And most men will smile

and say “I can do that”, but that’s a pretty weak muscle. So after

they do the exercise for a month or so [the same as the women do

by contracting then relaxing the muscle that stops the flow of

urination], they can try the test again. Then, they may try doing

the test with a wash cloth, and then a hand towel, and eventually

a wet hand towel. But don’t do the exercise with something over

the penis. This is just to test the strength of the muscle. The exercise

is for fun and sexual enjoyment.

AUTHOR: What affect does aging have on sexual response?

ANONYMOUS: There are some physiological changes during

the aging process. Men and women may take a little longer as

they get older to become sexually aroused. It may take longer for

men to have an erection and may take longer for ejaculation. For

women, it may take longer to have vaginal lubrication. Also,

women may not have as many contractions as they once did, and

the contractions may not be as strong. But instead of comparing

the process to how it was, it is important to enjoy sensual and

sexual as it is. Here again, the Kegel exercises can help in keeping

sexuality more vital.

Now you know all

Thank you